None more black stew

What the Hell? My culinary tribute to Spinal Tap. Black rice, black barley and black beans is a gooey mess of dark goodness. It’s like, how much more black could this be? And the answer is none. None more black. Feel free to improvise and add more hot sauce if you want to make this go to eleven. Black rice and black barley can be found in bulk at Whole Foods. What the hell should I drink? Dark beer! Thick and throaty. If you can find it, Fat Head’s Oompa Loompa Chocolate Cream Stout is really amazing. What the hell should I listen to? Big Bottom by Spinal Tap, of course. Triple bass assault. None more black stew   Save Print Prep time 20 mins Cook time 1 hour Total time 1 hour 20 mins   Author: Embrace the Cheese Serves: 8 Ingredients Rice ½ C. black rice (Forbidden black rice) 1 C. vegetable broth 1 tsp. bacon salt ¼ tsp. kosher salt Stew 6 C. vegetable broth ½ C. black barley 1 C. diced onion 6 cloves garlic, minced 2 carrots, diced 2 ribs celery, diced 1 Tbls. Italian seasoning ¼ C. chili peppers, minced (heat level of your choice) 1 tsp. garlic powder 1 tsp. onion powder 1 tsp. dried oregano 2 tsp. siracha chili sauce 1 15.5 oz can black beans, rinsed well 1 14.5 oz can diced tomatoes 1 bag Quorn grounds or Boca crumbles Instructions Rice Combine all rice ingredients in a small, heavy bottom pot. Bring to a boil. Cover, reduce heat to simmer and cook for 30-40 minutes or until all liquid is absorbed and rice is tender. Stew While rice is cooking start the stew In a large, heavy bottomed pot, combine broth, black barley, onion,...

Split pea and barley stew...

What the Hell? This is a vegetarian version of my favorite split pea and ham soup. Using pearled barley gives this stew some heft and rib sticking goodness. It’s stupidly easy to make and packed full of fiber and veggie goodness. Your colon will thank you. Eat it! What the hell should I drink? A nice mineraly, acidic white wine would be lovely. Something the in the Sauvignon Blanc family would be a good fit. What the hell should I listen to? She pays the rent by the Nomads. This is a Lyres cover. Since this soup is a different interpretation of my split pea and ham recipe it seems appropriate. Woot! Split pea and barley stew   Save Print Prep time 15 mins Cook time 60 mins Total time 1 hour 15 mins   Author: Embrace the Cheese Recipe type: Soup Serves: 6 Ingredients 1 Tbls. olive oil 1½ C. chopped onion 3 cloves garlic, minced 1 C. chopped celery 1 C. chopped carrots ½ tsp. black pepper 1 tsp. kosher salt 2 tsp. dried marjoram 1 tsp. dried thyme ½ tsp. dried rosemary 2 bay leaves 8 C. vegetable broth 1½ C. green split peas ½ C. pearled barley Instructions Heat olive oil in large, heavy bottomed pot or Dutch oven over medium heat. Add onions, garlic, celery and carrots and sauté until onions are translucent and tender. About 5 minutes. Add salt, black pepper, marjoram, thyme, rosemary and bay leaves. Stir until veggies are will coated. Add vegetable broth, split peas and barley. Stir to combine. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat and slightly cover. Simmer until the peas are tender and just beginning to fall apart. About an hour. Remove bay leaves. Season to taste with salt and pepper....

Garden Lentil Soup

What the Hell? Chop. Dump. Cook. Eat. No cooking skills needed. If you can chop vegetables, open a can and boil water you can make this soup! You have no excuses. Do it. Feel good about what you put into your gaping maw. I’ve seen you, and you could use the veg and fiber. What the hell should I drink? A nice, spicy Bloody Mary. Booze and veggies! Together at last! What the hell should I listen to? Parasight by Entombed. Something to help with all the chopping. Garden Lentil Soup   Save Print Prep time 15 mins Cook time 35 mins Total time 50 mins   Author: Embrace the Cheese Recipe type: Soup Serves: 8 Ingredients 3 carrots, diced 3 ribs celery, diced 1 lg. yellow onion, diced 1 lg. red onion, diced 5 cloves garlic, minced 1 lg. potato, diced 1 C. dried, brown lentils, rinsed and drained 1 C. corn 8 C. vegetable broth 2 bay leaves 1½ tsp. dried thyme 1½ tsp. dried oregano 1½ tsp. dried parsely ¼ tsp. crushed red pepper flakes 1 14.5 oz. can petite diced tomatoes 1 C. peas Salt and pepper to taste Instructions Place all ingredients except tomatoes and peas into a large sauce pot or dutch oven. Bring to a boil, reduce heat and simmer until vegetables and lentils are soft. About 30 minutes. Add tomatoes and peas. Simmer until heated through. Season with salt and pepper. 3.1.07...

Winter Squash Soup

What the Hell? Creamy, smooth, warm bowls of comforty goodness. Get yourself some good, hearty bread and hunker down with a big bowl. What the hell should I drink? Something light and white or rosé would be lovely. What the hell should I listen to? Last train to satansville by Swervedriver. Smooth and dreamy. Winter Squash Soup   Save Print Prep time 20 mins Cook time 1 hour 15 mins Total time 1 hour 35 mins   Author: Embrace the Cheese Recipe type: Soup Serves: 8 Ingredients Roasted squash 4 large acorn squash 3 T. olive oil 1 tsp. Bacon salt ¼ tsp. chipotle powder ½ tsp. garlic powder (not garlic salt!) ½ tsp. salt Soup base 1 stick of unsalted butter 1 lg. onion, minced 3 carrots, thinly sliced 6 cloves garlic, minced 6 C. vegetable broth 1¼ tsp. minced, fresh thyme 3 bay leaves ½ C. heavy whipping cream 1 C. grated Gruyére cheese (optional) Instructions Roast the squash Preheat oven to 400° Cut acorn squash in half and remove seeds. In a small bowl combine olive oil, bacon salt, chipotle powder, garlic powder and salt. Brush cut side of squash with oil mixture. Arrange squash halves in a large baking dish/pan. Roast for 45 minutes or until flesh is easily pierced with a folk. Remove from oven and allow to cool slightly. Scoop out flesh and set aside. Make the soup Melt butter in large pot over medium heat. Add onion, garlic and carrots and cook until tender, about 10 minutes. Add broth, roasted squash and herbs; bring to boil. Reduce heat and simmer until everything is very tender, about 20 minutes. Working in batches, puree soup in blender. Return soup to same pot. Stir in cream and bring to simmer....

Chicken Noodle Soup

What the Hell? One of my very favorite comfort foods. No matter what time of year, a big, steaming bowl of chicken noodle soup sets everything right and cures what ails me. This is a super simple recipe, requires next to no cooking skills. Another recipe that if you can boil water, you can make this soup. Impress your family and friends and show them how much you care. Doooo eeeet! What the hell should I drink? Give your liver a break and try something healthy for once, like some nice lemon tea. What the hell should I listen to? Falling back to earth by Bluebird. No real reason, I just really like this song. Chicken Noodle Soup   Save Print Prep time 10 mins Cook time 1 hour Total time 1 hour 10 mins   Comfort food! You love it! Author: Embrace the Cheese Recipe type: Soup Serves: 8 Ingredients 10 C. chicken broth 1 C. chopped carrots 1 C. chopped celery 1 C. chopped onions 2 tsp. poultry seasoning 1 tsp. dried thyme 2 bay leaves 1 tsp. fresh ground pepper 2 Tbls. fresh, chopped parsley 3 C. cooked, diced chicken 8 oz. noodle of your choice Instructions Place all ingredients up to the noodles into a large heavy bottom pot or Dutch oven. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat and partially cover. Simmer until veggies are tender. About an hour. Remove bay leaves. Bring back to a boil. Add noodles. Return to a boil and remove from heat. Cover and let noodles soak for 15 minutes. Season to taste with salt and pepper....

Split Pea Soup with Ham...

What the Hell? HAM! HAM! HAM! So, you’ve got some leftover holiday ham. Make some hearty, comforty  split peas soup! It’s stupidly simple, if you can chop veggies and boil water, you can make this soup. Impress your friends with your boiling prowess. Fill your belly with a salty, smokey bowl of this veggie packed goodness. You need your veggies! What the hell should I drink? A nice mineraly, acidic white wine would be lovely. Something the in the Sauvignon Blanc family would be a good fit. What the hell should I listen to? Squealer by AC/DC. It’ll make you understand. Split Pea Soup with Ham   Save Print Prep time 10 mins Cook time 1 hour Total time 1 hour 10 mins   Author: Embrace the Cheese Recipe type: Soup Serves: 6 Ingredients 8 C. ham broth or chicken broth 1½ C. green split peas 1 C. chopped onion 1 C. chopped celery 1 C. chopped carrots 1 C. chopped potatoes 2 cloves garlic, minced ½ tsp. black pepper ½ tsp. dried thyme ½ tsp. dried rosemary 2 bay leaves 2 C. cubed ham Instructions Place all ingredients into a large, heavy bottomed pot or Dutch oven. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low. Cover and simmer soup until the peas are tender and just beginning to fall apart. About an hour. Remove bay leaves. Season to taste with salt and pepper....

Rainbow Bean Soup

What the Hell? Beans! Beans! The musical fruit. You know the rest. Beans, good tasting and good for you. Full of fiber and antioxidants to keep your poopy system running smooth. Nobody wants a clogged up poopy system. Eat your damn beans and feel good! What the hell should I drink? A medium bodied Côtes du Rhône or a young syrah would be lovely. E. Guigal Côtes du Rhône is tasty. Beer is always lovely with beans too. What the hell should I listen to? Whistle Pig by Solace. So good it hurts. Rainbow Bean Soup   Save Print Prep time 20 mins Cook time 3 hours 30 mins Total time 3 hours 50 mins   Author: Embrace the Cheese Recipe type: Soup Serves: 4 Ingredients Beans ¼ C. dried kidney beans ¼ C. dried great northern beans ¼ C. dried split peas ¼ C. dried brown lentils ¼ C. dried black beans Soup 5 C. vegetable broth 1 C. diced onion 5 cloves garlic, minced ½ C. diced carrots ½ C. diced celery 2 tsp. dried oregano ½ tsp. chili powder ½ tsp. black pepper 1 tsp. lemon pepper seasoning ½ tsp. dried thyme 2 bay leaves 14.5 oz. can petite diced tomatoes Instructions Rinse beans well Place beans in a large microwave safe bowl and cover with cold water, with at least an inch of water above the beans. Loosely cover with plastic wrap. Place in microwave and cook on high for 7 minutes. Stir and add more water if necessary. Recover and cook for an additional 7 minutes. Drain beans and rinse well. Place beans in a large pot and add all ingredients except the tomatoes. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat and slightly cover. Simmer for 3 hours or until...

Veggie Potato and Mushroom Soup...

What the Hell? Roasted taters, garlic and mushrooms! A tasty triumvirate. So simple, so yummy you’ll lick the bowl clean. What the hell should I drink? Russian Imperial Stout. Mmmmmm thick and hearty, liquid doom.  Stone Imperial Russian Stout is a powerful mouthful. What the hell should I listen to? The Tubes, of course. Duh. White Punks on Dope. Veggie Potato and Mushroom Soup   Save Print Prep time 20 mins Cook time 1 hour Total time 1 hour 20 mins   Roasted taters, garlic and mushrooms! A tasty triumvirate. So simple, so yummy you’ll lick the bowl clean. Author: Embrace the Cheese Recipe type: Soup Cuisine: No idea Serves: 4 Ingredients 4 medium yellow flesh potatoes, scrubbed and cut into ½" chunks 8 oz. crimini mushrooms, quartered 10 cloves of garlic, peeled 2 Tbsp. olive oil 1 small onion, chopped 3 leeks, white and light green parts only, thinly sliced 4 C. vegetable broth 1 tsp. dried thyme pinch of cayenne pepper 2 bay leaves salt and pepper to taste Garnish shredded cheddar cheese Instructions Preheat oven to 450 degrees Place potatoes and garlic in a shallow roasting pan and drizzle with 1 Tbsp of olive oil. Sprinkle with salt and pepper; stir to coat. Bake for 15 minutes. Add mushrooms and stir Bake an additional 15 minutes or until potatoes and mushrooms are browned. In a large sauce pan, heat 1 Tbsp. of olive oil. Saute onions and leeks for 5 minutes. Add potatoes, garlic, mushrooms, broth, thyme and cayenne. Bring to a boil, reduce heat and simmer, uncovered for 25 minutes. Remove bay leaves and discard. Puree half of soup with an immersion blender or food processor. Return to pot, stir and season to taste with salt and pepper. Serve in...

Veggie Black Bean Soup...

What the Hell? Fiber! Fiber! Fiber! Tasty and delicious fart fuel! Fill your belly and treat your body right with this healthy and hearty soup. This recipe makes a shit-ton! You will need a very large Crock Pot to hold it all. This freezes very well. What the hell should I drink? A good ale would sit right with this. Bells Two Hearted Ale is lovely. If you’re more of a wino, something fruity with low tannin would be best. In my opinion, tannins and black bean are not yummy. A nice Beaujolais or fruity Zinfandel would fit the bill. What the hell should I listen to? A big black bean soup need some Big Black. Cables by Big Black is my choice. Veggie Black Bean Soup   Save Print Prep time 1 hour Cook time 8 hours Total time 9 hours   Fiber! Fiber! Fiber! Tasty and delicious fart fuel! Fill your belly and treat your body right with this healthy and hearty soup. This recipe makes a shit-ton! You will need a very large Crock Pot to hold it all. This freezes very well. Author: Embrace the Cheese Recipe type: Soup Cuisine: Southwesternish Serves: 10 Ingredients 1 lb. dry black beans (or 4 15-ounce cans of black beans if you don't want to deal with dry beans) 8 C. water (6 cups if you're using canned beans) 1 C. carrot, chopped 1 C. celery, chopped 1 large red onion, chopped 1 medium yellow onion, chopped 8 cloves garlic, crushed 1 red bell pepper, chopped 1 yellow bell pepper, chopped 2 jalapeno peppers, seeded and minced ¼ C. dry lentils ½ C uncooked white jasmine rice 1 (28 ounce) can diced tomatoes 1 Tbsp. chili powder 2 tsp. ground cumin 2 tsp. dried...

Veggie Pasta Soup

What the Hell? So damn easy your dog could make this! If you can boil water, you can make this soup. This is my bastardized, vegetarian version of Italian Wedding Soup. Packed full of vitamins, it’s so tasty you won’t even realize how healthy it is. Popeye would get a boner over this soup. If you plan ahead you can serve this with the Crusty Bread Ball and pack your belly full of homemade goodness. What the hell should I drink? Your favorite cheap wine, jug or box. Go ahead, treat yourself, you know you love it. What the hell should I listen to? Dance around to a little Italian glam with Guida! Don’t stop rockin’ Veggie Pasta Soup   Save Print Prep time 5 mins Cook time 30 mins Total time 35 mins   This is soup is very similar to Italian Wedding Soup, but uses fake meat crumbles instead of meatballs. Super easy and very tasty. Yes, you will have spinach stuck in teeth after eating this. Enjoy with a friend and pick each others teeth. Author: Embrace the Cheese Recipe type: Soup Cuisine: Italian-ish Serves: 4 Ingredients 1 14.5 oz can of Italian-style diced tomatoes (with garlic, oregano and basil) 6 C. vegetable broth 2 tsp. dried Italian seasoning 4 oz. smallish pasta (elbow macaroni or small shells or mini-bow ties, whatever tickles your pickle) 12-16 oz. of ground meat substitute (Boca crumbles or Quorn crumbles or rehydrated TVP, whatever puts a breeze in your sails) 4 C. (5oz.) chopped, fresh spinach salt and pepper to taste 2-3 Tbsp. fresh grated Parmesan cheese Instructions Bring tomatoes, broth and Italian seasoning to a boil in a large pot over medium-high heat. Simmer 10 minutes. Add pasta, ground meat substitute, spinach, and Italian...

Veggie Lentil Stew

What the Hell? Lentil soup! With mushrooms and roasted veggies! Warm, hearty, satisfying and it’s really good for you! So full of fiber your colon will thank you. Chow down, gas up and dutch oven your loved ones! Farts always equal funny. Fact. This is fantastic with the Crusty Bread Ball. What the hell should I drink? A nice porter or stout would be a fine choice. Old Rasputin is lovely. What the hell should I listen to? “Out in the cold wind, out in the snow.” Dead Meadow – What needs must be. Veggie Lentil Stew   Save Print Prep time 20 mins Cook time 1 hour Total time 1 hour 20 mins   Yummy, hearty, full of texture and fiber. Perfect for a cold winter day with some rustic, crusty bread and a nice dark ale. Author: Embrace the Cheese Recipe type: Soup Serves: 8 Ingredients Roasted veggies 2 C. corn - fresh from the cob is best, but thawed frozen works too. ½ C. diced carrots 1 pint of cherry tomatoes, sliced in half 1 Tbsp. minced garlic 1 Tbsp. olive oil salt and pepper Soup 1 Tbsp. olive oil 8 oz. chopped crimini or mini-bella mushrooms 1 red bell pepper, chopped 1 medium red onion, chopped 4 cloves garlic, minced 1 (6 oz.) can tomato paste 6 cups vegetable broth 1½ C. dried, brown lentils, rinsed and drained 3 tsp. dried basil 1 tsp. dried thyme 1 tsp. poultry seasoning ¼ C. dry sherry Grated fresh Parmesan cheese Instructions Roast the veggies Preheat oven to 400 degrees Put corn, carrots, tomatoes, garlic, and olive oil in a large roasting pan. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Stir the mixture to combine and spread out to a single layer. Roast...

Spicy chicken tortellini soup...

What the Hell? Easiest soup on the planet. One pot and almost no chop. You don’t even have to know how to cook to make this. If you can use a can opener and boil water, you can make this. Impress your friends! What the hell should I drink? Something light and in the lager category. Not too hoppy, just beery, beer, beer. Great Lakes Dortmunder Gold Lager is a tasty choice. What the hell should I listen to? Something loud and angry! I’m going with the Gallows – In the belly of a shark. Damnit! Spicy chicken tortellini soup   Save Print Prep time 5 mins Cook time 20 mins Total time 25 mins   Easy. Easy. Easy. Yummy. Yummy. Yummy. Author: Embrace the Cheese Recipe type: Soup Cuisine: Southwestern-ish Serves: 4 Ingredients 1 32 oz. box of fat free, low sodium chicken broth 1 16 oz. jar of salsa. (heat level of your choice) 1 tsp. minced garlic 1 15.25 oz. can of black beans, rinsed and drained 1 C. frozen corn 2 C. diced, cooked chicken 2 C. frozen cheese tortellini 2 Tbsp. chopped cilantro (optional) Instructions In a medium, heavy bottomed stock pot, bring chicken broth, salsa and garlic to a boil. Add black beans, corn and chicken. Reduce heat and simmer 10 minutes. Add tortellini and continue to simmer until tortellini is heated through. Ladle into bowls and sprinkle with cilantro....